Prisoners, much like people who learn they are going to die soon, go through five emotional stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and, finally, acceptance.  Where they are in this process can help explain their behavior.

Stage I: Denial  Denial begins when a person enters prison.  It generally lasts between one and three years for those sentenced to more than ten years.  Some short-termers are in a state of denial for their entire sentence.

Those in the denial stage find it hard to believe they’re really in prison.  They focus on getting released.  They tend to blame their situation on somebody else.  Some prisoners work through denial gradually.  Others leave this stage abruptly when faced with a crisis.

Stage II: Anger  When they can no longer deny the situation, prisoners often become angry with everyone.  Some prisoners join prison gangs during the anger stage.  Some learn to play a game called “being sneaky,” in which they gain slight control over their lives by pretending to do what the guards want.

Stage III: Bargaining  Since no one answered their angry demands, prisoners may resort to asking nicely for what they want.  Prisoners attempt to make deals with other people.  They promise they will mend their ways in exchange for the favor they seek.

Stage IV: Depression  When it becomes clear that neither anger nor bargaining is working, depression descends.  One prisoner reports, “When it hit me that I was really in prison, and I was going to be there for a long time, I was pretty depressed.  I wanted to sleep all the time.  I wanted to escape my pain.”

At this stage prisoners begin to face the consequences of their past actions and the current situation. They grieve the loss of freedom and the pain of separation from loved ones.  Incarcerated mothers are devastated when they realize they won’t be with their children for many years.  Depressed prisoners typically withdraw from family and friends.

Stage V: Acceptance  Ultimately prisoners accept the fact that they are in prison for the long haul.  This makes some prisoners emotionally numb to everything and everyone.  Others go through a period of genuine soul-searching.  They begin to accept responsibility for their situation.  Many show a sincere desire to change their lives.

Painful problems, like a family crisis or a move to a new facility, can trigger a return to earlier feelings.  Prisoners must then work through the emotional stages of incarceration again so they don’t remain in denial, anger, or depression.